Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Reasons Why Zack is Better

I played as Cloud but I never did like the guy. Now Zack is way more awesome. Why can't Cloud die instead lol. Again, this is from the wikia.

—Zack to Cloud
"How dare you leave her for 4 YEARS?!!"
—Cloud to Zack
"How dare you rip off my look, personality, clothes, sword, and well... EVERYTHING?!!! EVEN MY WOMAN?!!!"
—Zack to Cloud
"That's because I embrace my dreams... And protect my SOLDIER honor!"
"You're now stealing my line?!!! That's copyrighted, you know!"
"Zack, it's not stealing... it's mimicry"
—Bartz Klauser
"...good call..."
—Cloud whispering to Bartz
—Zack, using Apocalypse
—Zack Chain Slashes Cloud to pieces.
He is a true hero!
He isn't a emo (Cloud/Squall) nor a crybaby (Tidus/Vaan, mostly Tidus).
He's a better boyfriend to Aerith than Cloud (DAMN YOU CLOUD! YOU LET AERITH DIE).
He's so cool, Cloud spent his whole life trying to be him. (though he never was, or is, a fourth as cool as Zack)
He whooped Sephiroth's ass...twice.
He's a REAL 1st class SOLDIER, and not some lame wannabe.
He changed his hairstyle in one game.
He only has 2 weapons, saying he doesn't need Ultima Weapon.
He can use a sniper rifle!! And he fought enemies using an umbrella!!
He can defeat summons ALONE!! Definitely cool.
He can pull of saying, "Embrace your dreams."
It took nine people to beat various monsters and a superpowered mama's boy. He did that alone and much more.
He carried Cloud's half-dead ass across the world and nobody thanked him! WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?!
He died for Cloud's half-dead ass and nobody thanked him (well, Сloud did, but Zack was already dead).
Him and Aerith have totally hooked up in the Lifestream.
He beat two 1st Class SOLDIERs, while Cloud has only beaten one. Two is more than one, so he is automatically better.
He has an in-game fanclub. Does Cloud have a fanclub that is in his own game and therefore canon? I think not.
Who would you rather like? Zack, a 1st class SOLDIER with dreams and honor, or Cloud, a washout loser who stole from said 1st classe SOLDIER's corpse after that same 1st dragged his half-dead ass across the world because he considered him a friend? Some friend.
Oh, here's the real reason Cloud let Zack die: Zack was supposed to be in Dissidia, but Cloud killed him to keep his fame. Bastard.
He's the original and takes care of business alone. No need for a trio to beat up the fat bosses
Has access to the SUPER PUNCH!! Materia.
Just thinking about his loved ones will tear you a new asshole.
He isnt Cloud. Thats a plus if Ive ever seen one.
Others must give items to Magic pots, Zack takes them away.
Started off with that most humblest of origins; about a couple minutes total of screen time.
He can kick ass with an Umbrella!
Zack was kept off of Dissidia because his coolness would freeze the game.
He doesn't need a sword, heck, he doesn't even need an umbrella to kick ass, he will pummel you with his fists!
While most people on this list accomplished their trials accompanied by a group of people, Zack did everything mostly alone!
Aerith waited 4 friggin years for him to just write back. And that's with only a couple of dates! You know he is a playah!
He got a game just for himself!
Zack can deliver just as much damage with just the Buster Sword as Cloud can with the Ultima Weapon, because Zack is the real deal!
If Zack had gotten a bigger part in the original VII, it would have been a much better game!

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